Submissive Tasks for Beginner Couples: 25 Ideas for a Kinky Date Night

In BDSM, a task is an order. The dom gives it, the sub carries it out. Sounds simple. But when you're new, the hard part is coming up with one. What do you ask for? How long should it last? And how do you know if it worked? That's where we come in. We've collected 25 submissive tasks from the Kinky Date Night deck. Each one has a clear end, and it's always clear when the sub slipped up. So you both know when a reward is due, and when a punishment is.

What makes a good BDSM task for beginners?

• It can fail. "Don't move until the time runs out" is a good task. "Be good" isn't, because nobody can tell if it worked.
• It's short. 1–5 minutes. That way you fit several into one evening, and nobody gets worn out.
• It fits your limits. If bondage or pain isn't for one of you, skip those tasks.
• It has a consequence. If it works, a reward follows. If not, a punishment.

Stillness and patience

The simplest tasks. The sub can't move, while you touch them, stroke them, or just lean in close. You'll see how hard it is for them to stay still when your breath is tickling their neck. No gear needed, and they're perfect for the start of the night.

Task

Don’t move while I stroke you

Lie down. Until time runs out, I slowly stroke you where the die rolled. You may only blink. If you move, you failed.

Task

Breath on your skin

Lie down, close your eyes. I trace your body with my breath without touching you. If you move before time runs out, you failed.

Task

Wait for the kiss

Stand before me, lips slightly parted, and keep still. I lean close but only kiss you when time is up. If you lean in, you failed.

Task

Wartenberg wheel

Lie down and close your eyes. Until time runs out, I roll the Wartenberg wheel over where the die rolled. If you move, you failed.

Task

Staring contest

We look into each other’s eyes. Whoever blinks or looks away first loses. If it’s you, you failed.

Balance and skill

Here an object decides whether the task worked. If the coin or the book drops, the sub failed. That's great for beginners, because the dom doesn't have to be the judge. The object doesn't negotiate.

Task

Hands on the table

Put your palms on the table until time runs out. Meanwhile I do to you what the die rolled. If you lift them, you failed.

Task

Coins on your hand

I put a coin on the back of your outstretched hand. Until time runs out, I do what the die rolled. If it falls, you failed.

Task

Book on your head

Stand up straight with a book on your head. Until time runs out, I spank you with what the die rolled. If it falls, you failed.

Task

Coins on your tongue

Stick out your tongue, I put coins on it one by one. If fewer than three stay on, you failed. I pamper you 10 seconds per coin.

Task

Coin on the wall

On your knees, press a coin to the wall with your nose. Until time runs out, I do what the die rolled. If it falls, you failed.

Focus

In these, the sub works in their head. Counting, guessing or copying. Meanwhile the dom does everything to break their focus.

Task

Count down

Count down from 105 by threes while I kiss your neck. Miss one, start over. If you don’t reach zero before time is up, you failed.

Task

Guess what touches you

Blindfold on. I stroke you with something, you guess what it is. As many times as the die rolled. One wrong guess: you failed.

Task

Mirror me

Stand facing me. I move slowly and touch myself. Copy everything until time runs out. If you fall behind or differ, you failed.

Task

Fake an orgasm

Fake an orgasm for me – with sounds, with moves, as well as you can. If I don’t believe it, you failed.

With bondage

You don't need cuffs to tie someone up. A tie or a belt does the job. Tie it so two fingers fit underneath.

Task

Tied up and tickled

I tie you down with what the die rolled and tickle you until time runs out. If you laugh, you failed.

Task

Undress me with your teeth

I tie your hands behind your back with what the die rolled. Undress me with your teeth only. Not done in time? You failed.

Role play: puppy, kitten, foot worship

If pet play or a foot fetish fits your limits, these are light, playful tasks. Expect a lot of laughing. And it can be surprisingly hot when your partner purrs or begs.

Task

Purr

Lie in my lap like a kitten. I stroke you, and you purr the whole time. If you stop before time runs out, you failed.

Task

Lick my hand like a kitten

Lick my hand like a kitten: my fingers one by one, then my palm. If you stop before time runs out, you failed.

Task

Fetch it in your mouth

On all fours. I throw what the die rolled, you fetch it in your mouth, as many times as it rolled. Use your hands: you failed.

Task

Beg like a puppy

Kneel, paws up, tongue out. Until time runs out, I do to you what the die rolled. If you break the pose, you failed.

Task

Foot worship

Kneel in front of me. Kiss, lick and rub my feet and calves until time runs out. If you go higher than my knee, you failed.

Level 2: when you're feeling bolder

These are more intimate. They're about oral and about begging. Bring them out once level 1 went well, and you're both curious what comes next.

Task

Turn me on, no hands

You have the time the die rolled to get me wet/get me hard. You can’t use your hands. If you don’t manage, you failed.

Task

Follow with your mouth

Kneel, your mouth a breath from my pussy/my cock. I move slowly, you follow. Touch it or fall behind before time is up: you failed.

Task

Keep your hips still

Lie on your back. I slowly lick/suck you until time runs out. Your hips can’t move – push toward me or pull away, and you failed.

Task

Beg

Kneel and beg for what the die rolled: why you deserve it, what you’ll give for it. Can’t convince me in a minute? You failed.

What comes after the task?

The task is only one half of the game. If the sub nails it, a reward follows. You'll find ideas in the article on rewards. If not, a punishment comes. That's what the BDSM punishment ideas article covers. You can browse the whole deck here, with every task, punishment and reward.

Kinky Date Night handles all of this for you. You tell it what gear you have and what's okay. The game draws a card, and the dice decide the details.